Subscribe to Thank God It’s Friday
Scroll down to search or read more
The Book of Kenrick Part XXIII
In 2011, God the Uncle – my imaginary Uncle Godfrey –called me to sum up the Bible in the voice of Kenrick, the kind of tess who goes backstage at the Tobago Jazz Experience to get David Rudder’s autograph and borrows a pen from Farmer Nappy and a piece of paper from Benjai.
Last day, Joseph, who had become Pharaoh’s right hand corn man, had tricked the brothers who sold him into slavery to ransom their brother Simeon with their youngest brother, Benjamin, and had thrown big fete in Egypt for his little brother. Their father, Jacob, had been reluctant to use Benjamin to bail out Simeon, fearing loss of yet another son. (Daughters don’t matter in the Old Testatment, except for begetting.)Read more
The Book of Kenrick Part XVII
In 2011, I was called by my Uncle Godfrey - God the Uncle - to sum up the Bible in the voice of Kenrick, the kind of tess who derides religion as superstitious bunk but fasts for Ramadan and gives up drinking for Lent every year “for the discipline”. I chose the King James as the most widely accepted version of the Word of God (even if it was actually agreed upon by British civil servants working for a probably homosexual monarch 1611 years after God first troubled Himself to speak, with all the divine inaccuracies those circumstances might imply).
These Kenrick columns are not an aspersion on the Bible but a celebration of our own voice, as any sinner worth his pillar of salt ought readily to discern. Last day, Jacob, son of Isaac, was looking for wife in Haran after he lost Isaac’s blessing to his brother, Esau. Jacob fell asleep on a stone and dreamt of a ladder to the heavens that Adrian Lyne later made into an unsettling, spookily atmospheric film starring Tim Robbins and Danny Aiello.Read more