BC Pires


Firetruck it All

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Thank God It’s Friday

King of Trumps

For the Rip Van Winkles who fell asleep in 2017, it was 20 years ago, today, that the 45th American president was inaugurated. The 78-year-old future BC Pires reflects, on 20 January 2037, on how the USA was changed THE LAST GREAT President’s inauguration on 20 January 2017 was overshadowed by nothing, not even the early morning bombings of abortion clinics all over the USA by the newly-formed fighting wing of the Promise Keepers, the Covenant Enforcers. The liberal communist socialist BBC, CNN and other leftwing media/guerrilla groups thrust microphones at the Last Great President– a treasonous action requiring automatic execution today – and read more...

Firetruck It Man

And I think it’s going to be a long-long time/ ‘Til touchdown brings me round again to find/ I’m not the man they think I am at home/ Oh no, no, no, I’m a rocket man/ Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone – Elton John, from the song, “Rocket Man”NOT EVEN TWO proper weeks in and already this year is sizing up to be a long-long one. Still fully seven days clear until the installation of President Jackass, and the longest four years in history actually begins counting down and, as if Time itself fears that unholy inauguration, the hours preceding it drag by and the minutes grind down into individual seconds that creep read more...

O Crystal Balls

TO WRITE a sparklingly original newspaper column you’ve got to plagiarize brazenly and, in 1999, I stole a great idea from Robert Steinback, then of the Miami Herald. At the start of every year, Robert wrote a column of predictions and assessed the accuracy of the previous year’s predictions.Robert’s predictions were serious, because he lived in what we considered the leading First World liberal democracy (until last November, when Americans apparently voluntarily elected the kind of fraudulent buffoon normally produced only by corrupt Third World dictatorships; in the second or third generation). Here, though, where we alternate between electing read more...

Firetruck 2016

ONE DAY left in this firetrucker and I can’t wait for it to be done and gone; mankind can’t even risk writing that he can’t wait for it to be “dead and gone”, should in case this bad-mind mofo of a year take it firetrucking literally and take one of his own in its dying seconds. God knows 2016 has taken away way too many from all of us who ever saved the day by dancing the night away.David Bowie, who justified his life, and defined mine, with “A Space Oddity” – what am I, if not that? – and who wrote so many more songs that saved me, from “Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes” to the “Heroes” they’ll read more...

​Christmas Adam

MY YOUNGER brother and his dead-end friends – none of them feared widely for their rapier wit – were nevertheless the first people I heard use the expression, “Christmas Adam” to refer to today, the 23rd of December. More than 15 years ago, he’d invited me to his home, saying, “Come anytime from 6.30pm onwards, on Christmas Adam” and, when I baulked, offered the explanation, “Well, if the day before Christmas is Christmas Eve, and the Bible says that Adam came one day before Eve, the day before Christmas Eve have to be Christmas Adam!”But perhaps I doubt my junior sibling’s claim to Christmas Adam fame out of simple professional jealousy: as with David Rudder’s “Rally ‘Round the West Indies”, Oscar Widle’s “I can resist anything but temptation” or William read more...

Firetruckery of the Day

​For the Gemini in All Our Bellies

The greatest modern challenge – and it’s really unique to our age – is to separate the ludicrous from the genius. We have to overcome the challenge everywhere from the Cabinet through the campuses to the catwalk: are we supposed to admire or sneer at those policies, courses or fashions? But, extreme sushi notwithstanding the contradiction of our age hasn’t so far been literally served up on a plate in front of us. Read more
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​Guess Who's Back in Firetruckery?

I haven’t firetruckery-ied around here for some time. I’m not sure if my reluctance to post arose because the US presidential election has by itself provided more firetruckeries than the world has needed for months, so more from me seemed otiose, or because I have myself been under a lot of all kinds of pressure in the same period. For one reason or another, e.g., most of them lying outside my choice, I Read more
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Mano-a-mano showdown

Still reeling from the Brexit, like the rest of the world – apart from the few million English & Welsh people who voted for it – and I find myself hoping that my thinking is a bit muddled, like how you just can’t do a cryptic crossword or watch The Usual Suspects if you have a head cold.

Because, if I’m not muddled, it’s becoming clearer and clearer that there is a right wing tide (packaged as concern for one’s own safety) that is rising fast enough to float the presidency of the Drumpf.


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Cub Your Enthusiasm

It’s not been a good week to be an animal anywhere in the world, as Harambe, the17-year-old silverback gorilla at Cincinnati Zoo might have told you, if he hadn’t been shot dead in his own pen (in the understandable haste to save the life of a three-year-old boy who’d wandered into the enclosure).

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Trini to d Bone

The Arima Kid - pt I

You’ve been involved in media and culture longer than most people have been alive?Since 1946! I should say a little before that because, as a child, I wrote little things to the Guardian’s Tiny Mites. I suppose I had that desire to be in the limelight, that vanity. My parents gave me the Read more

The High Cost of Living

My name is Robin Foster and I’ve found out that, to go about the business of living, you have to accept your own death.If you look at my face good, you go see Pelham St and the Circular Road running right through it. I’m from the Belmont that David Rudder sang about.Myself and Trevor Read more

BC Pires

is a barrister by qualification (class of 1984) but, for the last 28 years, has done nothing but write to earn a living. His flagship column, Thank God It’s Friday, has appeared in either the Trinidad Guardian or the Trinidad Express since Ash Friday, 1988. He has written about film from an informed lay perspective for the same period and is as close as the cricket-playing West Indies gets to a film critic (though he refuses that label). He has written for many publications, including the London Sunday Observer and the London & Manchester Guardian. Since 2010, his personality-based feature, “Trini/’Bago to D Bone” has been appearing in the Trinidad Guardian. Since 2002, he has been the editor of Cré Olé, the Trinidad & Tobago annual restaurant guide.

Sitar Satire

My name is Ravi Sankar and I don’t play the sitar but I love Trinidad & Tobago music.I know they have a man, Ravi Shankar, and his daughter, Anoushka, who are famous for playing the sitar. I will tell people my name and normally I will get a little tease in-between. I don’t really listen Read more

The World of Trinidad & Tobago

My name is Anthony Collymoore and I recently retired after teaching at Morvant/Laventille for 27 years.I’m from Cascade. That “nasty white boy” area.I married twice, first to Fay Lopez, back in 1985. We have two children, Jacob, now 30,m and Justin, 28-ish. And now Debbie Read more

BC Pires

is a barrister by qualification (class of 1984) but, for the last 28 years, has done nothing but write to earn a living. His flagship column, Thank God It’s Friday, has appeared in either the Trinidad Guardian or the Trinidad Express since Ash Friday, 1988. He has written about film from an informed lay perspective for the same period and is as close as the cricket-playing West Indies gets to a film critic (though he refuses that label). He has written for many publications, including the London Sunday Observer and the London & Manchester Guardian. Since 2010, his personality-based feature, “Trini/’Bago to D Bone” has been appearing in the Trinidad Guardian. Since 2002, he has been the editor of Cré Olé, the Trinidad & Tobago annual restaurant guide.